yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
