I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
