should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
