apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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