I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
