It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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