I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
