Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
