i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
