You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
