I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
