he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
