well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
