The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
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