Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
