Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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