apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I didn't notice because vodka
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
