Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Every concussion has its silver lining
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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