i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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