i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
