think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
