Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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