So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
