just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
