Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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