ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
