He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize