Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
