If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
