don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
