Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
