it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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