I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
