Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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