people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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