dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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