Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
