Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
