my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Rumble strips road head = magical
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
