Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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