The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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