Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
