Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
