If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
