she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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