They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize