what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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