Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
