Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize