Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
