my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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